Prologue of C.E. LF2

[Sharkitoon]

The beginning was nice and detailed,
it's nice to learn how Davis got his energy punches.

But the ending,
it's too rushed,
try making it longer and express his emotions along the
way slowly,
cause when - "Sadness, rage and fury all swept through Davis at once. "
when i read that line, i didn't feel anything, if you started with a proper
beginning, showing the bond and love between mother and son.
Then readers can get the feeling of anger when reading that line.
I read a book called ' Chinese Cinderella ' once and i cried a lot while reading it
and felt like I'm the character in the book.


But this story really amaze me, the originality of it.
And it's nice to read.
Thank you for sharing =)