Quotes (Forum, MSN, ICQ, AIM, YIM, other)

[Dr. Time]

people used to laugh at me when I would say "I want to be a comedian", well nobody's laughing now.

my grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the local zoo

I saw a sign that said "watch for children" and I thought, "That sounds like a fair trade."

I refused to believe my road worker father was stealing from his job, but when I got home, all the signs were there

I was once at an ATM and this old lady asked me to help check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Are these from 9gag? I think I have seen them somewhere before, but just can't say where.
@^: Ok, thanks :P