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The vengeance

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The vengeance
Magnamancy Offline
Experienced Member
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Posts: 490
Threads: 14
Joined: Nov 2008
Thanks given: 132
Thanks rec.: 191 / 99
#3
05-21-2009, 08:27 AM
I only really have one suggestion, ad " to the start and end of your
paragraphs, to give a larger impression Post-Cen is talking to the
reader.

Your story is gripping, it encourages the reader to continue,
good work!
Trust you're all well.
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Messages In This Thread
The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-20-2009, 04:20 PM
RE: The vengeance - need profiles - by sadbhav - 05-21-2009, 07:37 AM
RE: The vengeance - need profiles - by Magnamancy - 05-21-2009, 08:27 AM
RE: The vengeance - need profiles - by Zabobula - 05-21-2009, 11:44 AM
RE: The vengeance - need profiles - by Drahcir - 05-22-2009, 12:53 AM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-22-2009, 01:31 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Zabobula - 05-22-2009, 01:58 PM
RE: The vengeance - by sadbhav - 05-22-2009, 02:22 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-23-2009, 10:52 AM
RE: The vengeance - by sadbhav - 05-23-2009, 02:45 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-23-2009, 02:54 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Drahcir - 05-23-2009, 03:02 PM
RE: The vengeance - by The Lost Global Mod - 05-23-2009, 05:53 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-23-2009, 05:56 PM
RE: The vengeance - by prince_freeza - 05-23-2009, 06:00 PM
RE: The vengeance - by sadbhav - 05-24-2009, 08:02 AM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-24-2009, 01:24 PM
RE: The vengeance - by sadbhav - 05-24-2009, 02:49 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-25-2009, 02:33 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Zabobula - 05-26-2009, 02:52 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-26-2009, 02:59 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Zabobula - 05-26-2009, 03:04 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-29-2009, 05:37 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 05-30-2009, 05:49 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-03-2009, 05:05 PM
RE: The vengeance - by SirisRhazael - 06-04-2009, 01:20 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Zabobula - 06-05-2009, 01:12 AM
RE: The vengeance - by The Lost Global Mod - 06-05-2009, 08:50 AM
RE: The vengeance - by sadbhav - 06-05-2009, 09:54 AM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-05-2009, 03:56 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Ascor - 06-05-2009, 04:00 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-06-2009, 05:04 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-07-2009, 05:12 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-10-2009, 12:57 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-12-2009, 05:18 PM
RE: The vengeance - by The Lost Global Mod - 06-12-2009, 07:10 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Zabobula - 06-13-2009, 12:12 AM
RE: The vengeance - by Drahcir - 06-13-2009, 03:59 AM
RE: The vengeance - by 3rdEnemy - 06-13-2009, 11:56 AM
RE: The vengeance - by Lord Anu - 06-13-2009, 12:25 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-13-2009, 12:47 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Zabobula - 06-13-2009, 05:00 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Reaper - 06-13-2009, 05:11 PM
RE: The vengeance - by Zabobula - 06-13-2009, 07:48 PM



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