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^I somehow wonder what the alternative to war would have been in the second beginning...
And no, we won't continue the forum novel. Mainly due to the fact that
- it has stopped way too long ago
- we got stuck( really, I've got at least a bit experience with internet novels, and many stop quite shortly after the fighting started because it somewhen begins to be fight->couldn't defeat evil-->go somewhere-->fight-->start cycle again.)
- Some of the ones partcipiating in there aren't here anymore.
Anyway, as this contest has ended, I can focus a bit more on the story section again and it might be that I come up with something the next weeks
Just being curious. What was too simple and restrictive about the beginnings? I mean, they have to be restrictive in a way, but I actually thought that there was less enough revealed to enable many possible stories. Just so that I can make it better next time.
Btw: If you want some suggestions for your story: There are some weird things about your sentence structure sometimes, but as I noticed how it's improving over time, I'm not gonna list those things. However, there are two things you really should have an eye on:
- Question marks?!! It really sounds weird without.
- Overpowerdness. Seriously, if somebody uses a trick to kill a bigger group of people, that's ok, but if he kills another 400! afterwards, it just isn't realistic. that seems to be a general problem with this guy, Manji and the like.
Still, as I said, I can see your improvement over time and I'm confident that you'll make a very good story for the next contest if you spent a bit more effort.
Btw: Argh! 7:7!!! How long is the voting phase going to last btw? Suspense is killing me.
And no, we won't continue the forum novel. Mainly due to the fact that
- it has stopped way too long ago
- we got stuck( really, I've got at least a bit experience with internet novels, and many stop quite shortly after the fighting started because it somewhen begins to be fight->couldn't defeat evil-->go somewhere-->fight-->start cycle again.)
- Some of the ones partcipiating in there aren't here anymore.
Anyway, as this contest has ended, I can focus a bit more on the story section again and it might be that I come up with something the next weeks
Just being curious. What was too simple and restrictive about the beginnings? I mean, they have to be restrictive in a way, but I actually thought that there was less enough revealed to enable many possible stories. Just so that I can make it better next time.
Btw: If you want some suggestions for your story: There are some weird things about your sentence structure sometimes, but as I noticed how it's improving over time, I'm not gonna list those things. However, there are two things you really should have an eye on:
- Question marks?!! It really sounds weird without.
- Overpowerdness. Seriously, if somebody uses a trick to kill a bigger group of people, that's ok, but if he kills another 400! afterwards, it just isn't realistic. that seems to be a general problem with this guy, Manji and the like.
Still, as I said, I can see your improvement over time and I'm confident that you'll make a very good story for the next contest if you spent a bit more effort.
Btw: Argh! 7:7!!! How long is the voting phase going to last btw? Suspense is killing me.