The 8-ball-Guru

[Som1Lse]

Question: Will everyone make a profile in Cartoon Soldier?
Guru's answer: Very doubtful.

Question: Why?
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: What?
Guru's answer: Outlook so so.

Question: What do you mean?
Guru's answer: Very doubtful.

Question: Could you try to answer correctly?
Guru's answer: Outlook so so.

Question: Just answer yes or no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Guru's answer: I have my doubts.

Question: Ok will everyone make a Cartoon Soldier profile?
Guru's answer: Of course not!

Question: Grrrrrr!
Guru's answer: Most likely.

Question: How many will?
Guru's answer: Definitely no.

Question: A number please?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: YES.

Question: Will there be more than 1000000?
Guru's answer: As I see it, yes.

Question: Exactly 10000000?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: YES.

OK everyone. Make a profile till we got 10000000. Or face the gurus wrath.

[snorsorbet]

Oh, hell!
Even the 8ball guru thinks that I am mafia?

Q: Am I mafia?
A: Yes, definitively.

Q: Am I a citizen?
A: Very doubtfull.

EDIT: I didn't copy the exact text, so it might have answered slightly different.

[Reaper]

lol... Sorry BP, congratz MH

Question: nave
Guru's answer: Is this supposed to be a question?

Question: Bluephoenix
Guru's answer: Forget about it.

Question: MH-Razen
Guru's answer: Yes - definitely.

Question: Reaper
Guru's answer: That is unlikely.

Question: Just_a_phil
Guru's answer: No.

Question: Alectric
Guru's answer: Yes, if your parents let you.

Question: Marshall
Guru's answer: Don't bet on it.

Question: Drahcir
Guru's answer: Forget about it.

[Simoneon]

Question: Well, I know that You know everything, but do You know that You'll never answer my question? I mean You're bored of this, everybody thinks that You know everything, but that's not really true yeah? So my question is: Do You really know everything?

Guru's answer: That is not in my hands.

[Ramond]

Question: Have I been to Croatia?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: YES.

Question: Have I been to Ireland?
Guru's answer: No.

Epic fail.

EDIT.

Question: What is the answer to life, the universe and everything?
Guru's answer: NO U!

Epicer fail.

[Alectric]

Question: is it pineapple time?
Guru's answer: There are some things that are better be left untold...

Question: whats your favourite colour?
Guru's answer: You really do not want to know that.

Question: GTFO
Guru's answer: Yes - definitely.

Question: is my awesomeness over 9000?
Guru's answer: How comes that you even ask?

Question: is there such thing as happiness?
Guru's answer: Yes.

Question: if you are so smart, what is the square root of 2039
Guru's answer: That is not in my hands.

Question: i want to know
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: no
Guru's answer: Don't count on it.

Question: why?
Guru's answer: There are some things that are better be left untold...

Question: why am i having a conversation with some smart arse program?
Guru's answer: Very doubtful.

Question: then what are you?
Guru's answer: You really do not want to know that.

Question: please tell me!
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: NO.

(and some pay back)
Question: reaper
Guru's answer: You really do not want to know that.

[TheNave]

Question: What is the answer to everything?
Guru's answer: 42

damn, he really knows everything...

@BP
it only answers "42" if you ask it EXACTLY that question, you should change it that he answers "42" always when there is "answer" and "everything" in the same sentence

[vandesdelca]

Question: What is the answer to everything?
Guru's answer: 42

damn, he really knows everything...

@BP
it only answers "42" if you ask it EXACTLY that question, you should change it that he answers "42" always when there is "answer" and "everything" in the same sentence

answer everything in the world

[naruto hyuuga]

(Click to View)

Question: how are you?
Guru's answer: I have my doubts.

Question: are you a guru?
Guru's answer: Yes - definitely.

Question: seriously?
Guru's answer: Is this supposed to be a question?

Question: yes?
Guru's answer: I will tell you when you are old enough to hear it.

Question: im 100000 years old! tell me?
Guru's answer: You really do not want to know that.

Question: i do!! so tell me now?
Guru's answer: My reply is no.

Question: why!?!!?!
Guru's answer: Yes - definitely.

Question: so tell me already
Guru's answer: I'm sorry, I forgot. Try again later.

Question: waiting to try again
Guru's answer: Don't bet on it.

Question: nopw may i ask a question
Guru's answer: Yes, if your parents let you.

Question: my parents did so may i ask?
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: no?
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: no?
Guru's answer: You retard! You just asked this question!

Question: booyah
Guru's answer: Yes - definitely.

Question: naruto hyuuga
Guru's answer: Outlook good.

Question: nave
Guru's answer: It is certain.

Question: no one
Guru's answer: Don't count on it.

Question: Blue Phoenix
Guru's answer: You really do not want to know that.

Question: just_a_phil
Guru's answer: Forget about it.

Question: Drahcir
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: snorsorbet

Guru's answer: Not right now. Maybe later. But only maybe.

Question: so i am talking to a smart a** retard?
Guru's answer: I'm sorry, I forgot. Try again later.

Question: you forgot about yourself??
Guru's answer: Don't bet on it.

Question: who are you?
Guru's answer: Yes.

Question: your a yes?
Guru's answer: I'm sorry, I forgot. Try again later.

Question: grr your making me mad
Guru's answer: Don't count on it.

Question: but i am mad at you
Guru's answer: Is this supposed to be a question?

Question: no
Guru's answer: No. By the way; do you know the game? You just lost it.

Question: you also lost it
Guru's answer: Not right now. Maybe later. But only maybe.

Question: didn't you lose the game
Guru's answer: Don't bet on it.

Question: then i won
Guru's answer: Definitely no.

Question: you know the game? you just lost it
Guru's answer: It is certain.

Question: pwned!!!
Guru's answer: You will have to wait.

Question: wtf?
Guru's answer: Don't count on it.

Question: may you answer something correctly?
Guru's answer: As I see it, yes.

Question: so am i smart?
Guru's answer: I will tell you when you are old enough to hear it.

Question: i am 1000 years so tell me
Guru's answer: Forget about it.

Question: why?
Guru's answer: I'm sorry, I forgot. Try again later.

Question: may you show me god
Guru's answer: Don't count on it.

Question: may i kill nave?
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: may i kill myself?
Guru's answer: Not really, only if you're able to do a barrel roll.

Question: may i kill you?
Guru's answer: You will have to wait.

Question: may i kill you now?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: YES.

Question: yay!!!1
Guru's answer: Outlook bad.

Question: aww
Guru's answer: No. By the way; do you know the game? You just lost it.

Question: wait what is the game
Guru's answer: Outlook bad.

Question: who are you
Guru's answer: Outlook bad.

Question: may i kill your creator
Guru's answer: Definitely no.

Question: may i kill the 8ball -guru
Guru's answer: It is certain.

Question: so let me kill you
Guru's answer: Of course not!

Question: but you said i could
Guru's answer: You will have to wait.

Question: i don't want to
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: no?
Guru's answer: It is certain.

Question: it is certain what?
Guru's answer: No. By the way; do you know the game? You just lost it.

Question: what game?
Guru's answer: Not really, only if you're able to do a barrel roll.

Question: whats a barrel roll?
Guru's answer: Most likely.

Question: whats most likely
Guru's answer: Is this supposed to be a question?

Question: yes
Guru's answer: Outlook good.

Question: cool?
Guru's answer: No.

Question: am i cool?
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: am i smart?
Guru's answer: I have my doubts.

Question: am i dumb?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: NO.

Question: am i strong?
Guru's answer: Of course not!

Question: am i weak?
Guru's answer: Don't count on it.

Question: have i gone to india?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: YES.

Question: am i living in india?
Guru's answer: Concentrate and ask again.

Question: but i am living in india?
Guru's answer: NO U!

Question: me too
Guru's answer: I will tell you when you are old enough to hear it.

Question: do you live in mumbai?
Guru's answer: Not really, only if you're able to do a barrel roll.

Question: so i am in space?
Guru's answer: How comes that you even ask?

Question: you said i am nowhere thats why
Guru's answer: Very doubtful.

Question: so i am somwhere?
Guru's answer: Who knows?

Question: am i a idiot?
Guru's answer: There are some things that are better be left untold...

Question: am i a idiotic smart a**?
Guru's answer: Not right now. Maybe later. But only maybe.

Question: is Blue Phoenix a idiot?
Guru's answer: No. By the way; do you know the game? You just lost it.

Question: is Blue Phoenix a smart a**?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: NO.

Question: is Blue Phoenix a smart idiot?
Guru's answer: You really do not want to know that.

Question: is Blue Phoenix a smart geek?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: YES.

Question: is Blue Phoenix a retard?
Guru's answer: No.

Question: is naruto hyuuga a retard?
Guru's answer: Outlook so so.

Question: is pokemon a bunch of retards?
Guru's answer: Concentrate and ask again.

Question: is pokemon a bunch of retards?
Guru's answer: You retard! You just asked this question!

Question: is pokemon a bunch of retarded pokemon?
Guru's answer: Outlook bad.

Question: is a bunch of retarded pokemon good?
Guru's answer: NO U!

Question: is a bunch of retarded pokemon bad?
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: because i rock
Guru's answer: NO U!

Question: you a skull?
Guru's answer: Not really, only if you're able to do a barrel roll.

Question: are you dead?
Guru's answer: Yes.

Question: are you a undead being?
Guru's answer: I have my doubts.

Question: no
Guru's answer: Very doubtful.

Question: pokemon is the answer to everything?
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: no
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: what is the answer to everything?
Guru's answer: 42

Question: so when i am 42 i will noe everything?
Guru's answer: How comes that you even ask?

Question: because your a guru
Guru's answer: You pervert! I see it in your eyes!

Question: what the hell?
Guru's answer: Most likely.

Question: answer everything?
Guru's answer: Yes.

Question: so tell me the answer?
Guru's answer: Yes.

Question: yes is the answer?
Guru's answer: Of course not!

Question: no is the answer?
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: is yes and no a answer?
Guru's answer: Not right now. Maybe later. But only maybe.

Question: where are you going?
Guru's answer: As I see it, yes.

Question: who am i?
Guru's answer: That is not in my hands.

Question: are you made of brains?
Guru's answer: You pervert! I see it in your eyes!

Question: im asking if your smart you retard
Guru's answer: Who knows?

Question: so you are dumb right
Guru's answer: You will have to wait.

Question: i don't wan to
Guru's answer: You really do not want to know that.

Question: why!!@!
Guru's answer: You retard! You just asked this question!

Question: so i am talking to a smart alec flash file?
Guru's answer: My reply is no.

Question: aare you a pervert?
Guru's answer: It is certain.

Question: i am scared now?
Guru's answer: Are you kidding?

Question: are you a pervert?
Guru's answer: Concentrate and ask again.

Question: you pervert i see it in your eyes
Guru's answer: You will have to wait.

Question: pwned!@
Guru's answer: As I see it, yes.

Question: i pwned you
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: may you bow down to me
Guru's answer: Forget about it.

Question: may you bow down to me
Guru's answer: Forget about it.

Question: but i pwned you
Guru's answer: Is this supposed to be a question?

Question: umm no idea
Guru's answer: Don't bet on it.

Question: may i go for karate?
Guru's answer: Most likely.

Question: will my body hurt
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: body?
Guru's answer: You will have to wait.

Question: so am i cool
Guru's answer: Outlook bad.

Question: you are cool?
Guru's answer: I will tell you when you are old enough to hear it.

Question: so you are not cool
Guru's answer: Outlook bad.

Question: waitng
Guru's answer: Of course not!

Question: y i want to leave
Guru's answer: Who knows?

Question: i want to leave
Guru's answer: No. By the way; do you know the game? You just lost it.

Question: i noe the game and you just lost it
Guru's answer: Of course not!

Question: so i did not lose the game
Guru's answer: Outlook good.

Question: pwned
Guru's answer: Yes, if your parents let you.

Question: ok bye
Guru's answer: How comes that you even ask?

Question: so i can woot
Guru's answer: Not really, only if you're able to do a barrel roll.

Question: i can do this whatever
Guru's answer: Very doubtful.

lol im still not bored of this

[snorsorbet]

I'm booored~

Meh, not like anyone cares >.> (Click to View)

Question: Have you realized how retarded all of your answers are?
Guru's answer: I have my doubts.

Question: |-|0w r u d01ng!?!?!?!!1one?
Guru's answer: NO U!

Question: Am I utterly retarded?
Guru's answer: That is not in my hands.

Question: At the question before: Are you sure?
Guru's answer: You may rely on it.

Question: Should I stop asking questions?
Guru's answer: All sources are pointing to: NO.

Question: OK, then. Are you tired?
Guru's answer: Of course not!

Question: Am I tired?
Guru's answer: Outlook bad.

Question: At the answer before: Huh O_o?
Guru's answer: My reply is no.

Question: You are right... Are you a dumbass?
Guru's answer: Yes.

Question: Haha! That's it! I won't give you any more chanced to answer my questions!! Right?
Guru's answer: Yes - definitely.