This chapter which is featuring me and alectric (and lauli in some way) which is combined with a different approach of mine in terms of story writing, using Reaper's narrator style and zab's "my-hero-is-so-mighty"-style + my own awesome style, will let you wet your pants and scream in agony, because you obviously see your skills lack something i have.
I would say something like that if i would be marshall.. But i am not so here goes my version:
Hi I am done with the first chapter, enjoy it and c&c me as much as possible.
Humans are fragile, their bones break, their muscles get torn apart, their mind can be easily broken and even their emotions can be hurt pretty easily. But there is one thing in every human which nobody can take – their soul, their whole spirit – the spirit which casts the difference upon animals and humans. A spirit cannot be taken, though its core can decay and change the human being fundamentally. Their whole being, their actions, change when this part of the human being is changed. Therefore the soul is the most precious and mightiest part. You can’t change a human once its soul decided its way. Many humans’ souls decided that hurting other people, taking away their precious things, their life, their family, their money – just everything is more important than to be a benefit to the whole human society. This is the main reason why people like me exist. Detective is the word they call me. I prefer to be simply a decay snatcher. For I am a man who snatches the decayed souls from the human society. My name you ask? You can simply call me Phil but I guess you want to know my real name so badly. Philson Snatch is the name of the man you are talking to. But that’s just detail-picking. So now the short way: I am Phil and this is my story.
My office was small, like really small, the interest was at null point and I was just at the start of my career. Well I already had solved one or two cases but nothing really significant. At that time I still thought that I took the wrong job – it included everything I never wanted, boredom, too much movements and the annoying fact that my skills are not really in use. The best job I have ever had was the inspection of the case called “the missing jewel”. It sounds exciting doesn’t it? Well it wasn’t. In fact the case turned out to be a missing cat called jewel. I was so excited when I got the job and then felt ashamed about my own lack of sense and my dumbness. But I am drifting away from the real topic.
On this implied day, my morning was like always. Closing one window, opening the other. Drinking one cup of coffee after the other and simply opening and then closing a said to be interesting book every time I finished one cup. Like always, however something was different than usual. I was missing sugar. Normally I always buy more than enough sugar, but on this special day I was missing it. I have read a book about how small differences in our daily schedule gives a forecast that the implied day bares great changes in our life. It sounded ridiculous and at that time I didn’t believe in it, I was even thinking about burning the book. I was thinking about how the flames would engulf the book filled with nonsense as something disturbed my thoughts. It was the sound of someone knocking on my door. In a moment of shock I sat back on my chair, straightened my clothes and then cried “Come in” in a nervous manner. The door opened and a tall boy with an afro entered. He was wearing a black coat, grey pants and a white shirt. The dark blue tie around his neck rounded everything up. I couldn’t hide my disappointment, I was expecting something thrilling but this was merely a joke. Silently I cursed god for toying with me once again and then directly talked to the boy. “How can I help you?” His eyes began to glow when I raised my voice and his reply was full of motivation. “Sir Snatch, I want to be your pupil!” I raised one of my eyebrows and looked straight into his eyes. “And who sent you to me?” I said in the coldest manner I could think of. His eyes stopped glowing, his big smile from before turned into a neutral expression. “The police headquarters sent me here” He said looking at the various objects of my office. “Typical” I thought to myself and kept looking at the boy. He kind of reminded me of me in earlier times when I tried to get someone to teach me the arts of observation. Only remembering the name of my master already reminded me on his first rule “Never say my name, that’s no fresh thinking” I had to smirk and decided to speak to the boy again. “Very well then. I will tea-“ I started when the phone interrupted me. I accepted the call without hesitation. “Yes, okay, fine, I will be there in a minute. Fine bye!” I hung up and grabbed my hat alongside with my coat. “We got a job, my dear boy” I said to him and opened the door. While getting outside he said “by the way my name is Alchez, Sir Snatch” “Just call me Phil”.
(i did use only 3 paragraphs on purpose.. to put a difference between certain parts)
oh and put your comments in the discussion thread please
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